Normalize eating on the subway
Summary
A straphanger makes her case for normalizing eating on the subway while literally holding a Papa John's sandwich. She argues the train is basically a restaurant booth and refuses to let anyone tell her otherwise. "You have to liberate yourself," she tells Kareem. "A restaurant is whatever you want it to be." There are rules, though: nothing smelly, nothing you wouldn't microwave at an office, and you must leave no crumbs. The conversation spirals into whether laptops or sandwiches are worse on the train (laptops mean "you are going to do something bad to our country"), why the MTA doesn't have cafe cars, and whether spaghetti crosses the line. Kareem ends up taking a bite of her sandwich. He's hungry.
Full Transcript
So, what's your take?
Do I want eating on the subway?
100% disagree.
Why? We're sitting down. There's essentially a booth at a restaurant. It's fine. What am I supposed to do? Eat and not eat. You want me to starve cream?
Look at you.
What?
You're holding a sandwich on the train.
Yes. Like, I'm at a restaurant sitting down and I eat while walking. Nothing wrong with it. I get aggressive hiccups when that happens. Don't be worried about me. I'm fine. But I'm busy. This is a convenient, comfortable place to eat.
It's not a convenient, comfortable place to eat.
You've created the idea of a restaurant in your mind because you are like creating constraints in your own mind. You have to liberate yourself. A restaurant is whatever you want it to be. And right now I am in a restaurant. I will say like there are rules. Don't eat anything smelly. Anything you wouldn't microwave at an office.
I can smell what you're eating right now. And it smells amazing.
No. No. It smells good. I'm not going to lie. It smells good. I'm a little bit hungry.
See? And we just have to be careful like not to borrow phrase from Jen, but you have must leave no crumbs. I'm Jen Alpha. Obviously, I'm 12.
You look 13.
What can you eat on the train? Pizza.
Iconic New York foods. Pizza. Bagel. But all the foods are handheld. Anything that is handheld. I will say I do eat with a fork. Sometimes I go to a bodega and I get a chicken cutlet chopped up and I eat it with a fork. Nothing we can do about it.
Can you eat like spaghetti on the train?
I mean, you have to treat it like it's your grandma's house. You have to like, you know, be clean about it and not your hoarder grandma. My grandma was a hoarder. Mish, rest in peace. Uh, I mean, spaghetti is probably tough. By the way, the MTA has cafe cars. How come I can't eat on this train?
It would be nice if the MTA had a cafe. That would be sick.
That's a way to make revenue for the MTA.
The last train has tables and chairs. It could just be like this, like a little bench. It's funny cuz I will say when people pull their laptops out on the train I'm like you are sick in the head but I'm literally eating a steak dinner.
What's worth laptop or sandwich?
Sandwich is like we are a busy you know fastmoving city. Laptop is like you are going to do something bad to our country. People sit on the ground in the park and eat. Why can't you eat on the train?
I don't know. I'll do it.
You just took a bite of this. You do agree.
I know. And I'll take another bite too. I am a little
And it's good. You're hungry. What about this? We can be like Lady in the Oh, I ate the stem. That was not like I'm gross.